I went to a party and church festival this past weekend and wore my beloved Bookslut tank top to both. Previous to going out I did question whether or not it was appropriate to wear something that said Bookslut to a church festival. However, I concluded (rationalized?) that really the shirt was just a declaration of my love to read so it was okay. Right?

At the party there were small children everywhere. I further rationalized that the kids were too small to read so the Bookslut shirt was still okay. (Can you tell I grew up in a household where we weren’t even allowed to say “Shut up” or “ticked off,” let alone things like “Crap,” “Damn” or “Hell”?) Then one of the doctors from the hospital where I work came with his three kids to the party and his oldest daughter was 13. “Crap,” I thought. “This one can read my shirt.” So I tried to cover it up, being paranoid and a wee drunk about the whole thing. So what happens? The girl walks by into the house to get some food and looks over at me and says, “Nice shirt.”

A little later in the kitchen said Doctor walks in and sees my shirt and says, “Nice shirt. Did my daughter see it? She loves to read.”

Whew, so I am okay. On to the church festival.

We’re in the gymnasium where the people in my group are happily gambling away and I am happily being a drunken spectator, a cop stops in front of me and asks me, “Where did you get your shirt?” I am drunk. In a church. Wearing something I am clearly too paranoid to wear in public and there is a cop in front of me. Cops don’t stop me to ask me questions much. Maybe I am even scared of cops. Either way, my heart started beating faster. “I got it at bookslut.com,” I tell the cop. He then explains that his daughter loves to read and he might get her one.

What the hell? So am I the only one who grew up in some house where slut is a bad word? Am I repressed in my ability, or inability, to cuss? I don’t even think slut is a bad word, but I know my mom does.

I mean, shit.