That’s right, stalker. I have been furiously stalking a nearby house, a house that will be mine after tomorrow.
I put in the offer in on this house about a month and a half ago, with serious input and support from Wonder Boy. The current owners obviously knew we were fabulous and accepted the offer. And as of tomorrow the stalking stage of the relationship will be over and I will be launched headfirst into the world of home ownership.
The other day Wonder Boy and I drove two friends past the house, in out usual daily stalk where we sit in the street and stare at the house, a thin but steady amount of drool hanging from our mouths. And then the current owners walked out! They saw us – I am surprised they weren’t blinded by the sun’s reflection off our drool – and started laughing as we panicked and drove away.
Anonymous
The current owners probably are thinking twice about how “fabulous” you and Wonder Boy truly are by now and can’t wait to get out of the house which has suddenly turned into a place where strange cars drive slowly by at all hours of the day and night with people just staring! Have to admit, I STALKED your new house on Wednesday afternoon on my way to my MRI at Deaconess – fortunately, I was not caught my the new owners!
Pezgirl the Stalker……..
Anonymous
You might want to get the city to check out the stormwater runoff conditions for your new house. If too much drool goes flowing unattended for too long you might find yourself sump pumping a very wet basement. Cincinnati is notorious for poor waste water management, so please, please, please, call the city and have them check this out immediately.
Can you really stalk a house? I’m thinking Elmer Fudd tracking Bugs Bunny and I don’t believe that houses move quite so fast as wee little bunnies. If it is, again, I implore you with every cautious bone in my body to contact the city and have them check the house for extreme foundation settling exascerbated (sic) by over-moist salivatory glands. Also plug up the oral discharge with a couple of dozen Kroger brand cotton balls and call you primary care physician immediately.